Thursday, September 5, 2013

Pssst. What's the password?

Passwords are a part of our every day life these days, right?  Most people have to keep a list to keep up with all of them.  And then the Army makes you change it on a regular basis.  But with technology the way that it is, passwords are here to stay.

Not too long after both children figured out computers, they started watching our fingers as we entered passwords to get them to places they wanted to go.  Sometimes, we would consult them if we were having trouble remembering because they knew them so well.  They know Bay's passwords and May's passwords.  And of course, Jessa had a little bout with passwords several years ago ...  Now, our iTunes passwords are TOP SECRET, though, and we make them turn their heads before we enter it.  Don't need to pay for any more premium Angry Birds games, thank you very much.

And at school, both kids have to remember several logins and several passwords and even a pin code for lunch.  So one would think that sweet Spencer had this all figured out, right??

Well, he came to me a few days ago, all forlorn.

"Mom," he said, "I am locked out of my computer."  I was confused, how in heaven's name could this child be locked out of his computer.  He doesn't have it password protected.  It is HIS.  It never leaves the house.  "Why would it need a password?" I thought to myself.  And then I looked at my sweet child's sad face and asked him, "Son, when did your computer get a password?"  He replied, "Oh, I put one on it."  So I assumed that it was one of the passwords that he has seen us use before.  I typed a few.  They didn't work.  I asked him, "OK, Spence, what do you think your password is?"  And my smart, creative little boy did not bat an eye nor did he crack a smile.  As serious as he could be, he said, "Well, I am pretty sure that it is JaguarPajamaPants."  Um, well, I was not expecting that!  So I tried hard not to laugh because he was as solemn as a judge.  "Spencer, why in the world do you think that would be your password?  What would have made you pick that?"  And he looked up at me, and all matter-of-fact-like  said, "Well, it has always been my dream to see a jaguar wearing pajamas."  There you go.  It was as simple as that.

I was trying to Google this and find a solution.  David was attempting to help me long distance.  The other night, I even had him lay on my bed with his eyes closed and try and remember.  I was trying to pull a Cliff Huxtable making Vanessa retrace her steps and helping her find her report.  (spoiler alert: it was in the freezer.)  And he said, "Well, it used to be MagicOfMagic.  But that was before I changed my user name to Dog Lover 152."  I asked, "Honey, why DogLover152?  Were DogLover1 through DogLover151 taken??"  "Oh no," he said, "I just like the number 152."
Oh, DogLover152!  What is your password??
 So I asked him for other ideas.  "Maybe it had a 5 on the end or maybe it was 55 or wait, 15." he said.  I tried that.  All three.  He said, "Try, YayMeBooYou33."  That wasn't it, either.  In the end, retracing his steps didn't help.  I am no Bill Cosby.  So, I had to take this expensive paper weight across the street to my computer fixer.  I felt like I was giving up, but with Spencer's little brain, we may NEVER think of it.  I am sure David would have already figured it out, but I am not a computer wizard like he is.  After about 4 minutes and $19.38, the computer was unlocked and the nice computer man made me the admin, and I am the only one who knows the password.

And FYI, even after I told him NOT to put a password on ANYTHING else or he would become a sweet little Amish boy who only plays with wooden toys, he sheepishly informed me that he had put a password on his iPod.

I took a deep breath to keep from being angry.
"What is it, son?" I asked.
"Oh, Mom, don't worry.  It is really easy to remember," he said.
"Spencer, what is it?!" I implored.
"PopTartCode45" he replied.
Good thing he is cute...

Oh. My.

"Hey, mom?"
"Yes, Spencer."
"Maybe the password was JaguarPajamaShirt or it could have been JaguarPajamaNightCap?"
"Good night, Spencer."

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